My Shiny

Everyone who knows me knows I have a shiny. A happiness that seems to constitute my being. Nobody knows that I'm living with depression every day. And no one has to. Because depression won't stop me from being a happy person. I am the happy sad person. I don't care what my physiology does. This is my shiny and it will continue to shine.

Ask me anythingNext pageArchive

I scratched my husband the other night. Not like an accidental or even a sexy kind of scratch, but a deep scratch that left skin under my nails and made him storm off. Why? Because he was trying to be funny and was trying to lick my face, but by doing so he had me pinned down in a way where all I could move was my fingers and I panicked. I had to get free, and for a moment nothing else mattered.

He likes to play rough and that usually involves pinning me down. It probably happens every day and most of the time I can deal with it, but one in a hundred times, I can’t.

And I know people would say it’s not my fault, because another guy destroyed my trust, but my husband muttered under his breath while I was sobbing my apologies, “I’m paying for what another guy did to you.” And every time he gets hurt, it IS because of me. Because I don’t like psychs, because I believe that I need to spiritually heal too. This is not something that happens often, but when it does, I go into the same spiral of guilt and self-loathing that I used to every time that guy did something to me. I’m damaged goods and he deserves more. I want it to be over, I want to be better, and I think I nearly am. But nearly is still nearly and I can’t hurt my husband anymore. I love him too much.

Happy October 3rd! May cute boys ask you what day it is!

(Source: steveroegers)

PLEASE SOMEONE give me a piano to play right now like I can’t deal a month is too long to waiittttt

Don't ever hesitate. Reblog this. TUMBLR RULE. When you see it, REBLOG IT.

The original post only has US helplines. I've added UK helplines underneath. It would be great if people could add numbers from everywhere in the world.
Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453
UK Helplines:
Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org
Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111
Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk
Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk
b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk
b-eat youthline (for under 25's with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)
Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk
Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600
Drinkline: 0800 9178282
Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk
Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight
India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614
India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669
Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868, Free and available 24/7
suicide hotlines;
Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430
Australia: 13-11-14
Austria: 01-713-3374
Barbados: 429-9999
Belgium: 106
Botswana: 391-1270
Brazil: 21-233-9191
Canada: 1-800-448-3000
China: 852-2382-0000
(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)
Costa Rica: 606-253-5439
Croatia: 01-4833-888
Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67
Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908
Denmark: 70-201-201
Egypt: 762-1602
Estonia: 6-558-088
Finland: 040-5032199
France: 01-45-39-4000
Germany: 0800-181-0721
Greece: 1018
Guatemala: 502-234-1239
Holland: 0900-0767
Honduras: 504-237-3623
Hungary: 06-80-820-111
Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90
Israel: 09-8892333
Italy: 06-705-4444
Japan: 3-5286-9090
Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292
Malaysia: 03-756-8144
(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)
Mexico: 525-510-2550
Netherlands: 0900-0767
New Zealand: 4-473-9739
New Guinea: 675-326-0011
Nicaragua: 505-268-6171
Norway: 47-815-33-300
Philippines: 02-896-9191
Poland: 52-70-000
Portugal: 239-72-10-10
Russia: 8-20-222-82-10
Spain: 91-459-00-50
South Africa: 0861-322-322
South Korea: 2-715-8600
Sweden: 031-711-2400
Switzerland: 143
Taiwan: 0800-788-995
Thailand: 02-249-9977
Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800
Ukraine: 0487-327715

Reblog > Go to your tumblr > Click in the house > And try to get out of the house.

stevenstelfox:

thesugarhole:

endlesslysherlocked:

image

I JUST SPENT 2 HOURS OF MY LIFE TRYING TO FIGURE THIS OUT. OMG. MOST DIFFICULT THING I’VE EVER DONE.

I CAN’T FUCKING DO IT FUCK

let me reblog this again

AND YES! I FINISHED IT! :D

I CAN’T FUCKING DO THIS SHIT FUCK

I’M NEARLY FINISHED BITCHES

this is fucking addictive aksldjaklsdj I CAN’T 

imageI did it! omfg! 25 minutes!

ah i forgot i had this in my likes

gonna play it! why not

fuck, over an hour
protip: don’t drink while playing that

(Source: sou-inseguro, via geekongirl)

http://geekongirl.tumblr.com/post/97238580224/i-got-tagged-by-marilyn-dean-to-do-a-thing

geekongirl:

I GOT TAGGED BY MARILYN-DEAN TO DO A THING
Name: Hannah
Nickname: Well… none really. Some peopled called me Pluto, but that was ages ago.
Birthday: July 11th
Gender: Female
Sexuality: Straight
Height: 5’ 4”
Time zone: Central Standard Time
What time and date it is there:…

I GOT TAGGED BY GEEKONGRIL TO DO A THING 
Name: Amy
Nickname: Aimes, Aimsey, Amelia, Rapunzel, Mimi (funnily enough, all longer than my actual name)
Birthday: April 27th
Gender: Female 
Sexuality: Straight 
Height: 173cm
Time zone: Australian Eastern Standard Time (UTC +10:00h) 
What time and date it is there: Monday, 15 September 2014, 9:42am 
My Mug: Uhh is this meant to be like my mug shot or an actual mug of mine…? I’ll cover both bases :P

image

One of my more recent photos…

My mug… Yes it’s a soup mug; I drink a lot of tea.

I tag thatoddplace and rose-wanchors :)

(Source: ladytimelordandsouffles)

arelyhepburn:

This is the best gif you’ll ever see

fuzzykitty01:

theheartmaid:

love-is-vengeful:

mad-madame-k:

asherlockian:

daleksofbakerstreet:

THIS is how you mashup!!!

image

image

image

Holy Crap.

OH  MY FUCKGIN IU JUST FLAOILED ALLO OVER THE PLAC E HOLY FUCK HO LD ON THE RE GOD

TONY STARK CREAMS HIS SUIT WHILE LISTENING TO THIS

thatoddplace THIS IS AWESOME.

(Source: robospock)

I feel like my life is a TV show…

There is an abnormal number of complications and I’m like seriously can’t things just be quiet for a bit and the tiny Moffat elves writing my life are all like nooo we need the viewers let’s take your husband away again after not being home for two days!

gallifreyanconsultingdetective:

One of my favourite shows:

image

One of my least favourite shows:

image

Do you see my problem

That would be Moffat.

(via geekongirl)